Letting Go of Perfectionism: How to Overcome High-Achieving Tendencies

Let it goooooo! Perfectionism tendencies are not necessarily about being ‘perfect’.

They often develop unhelpful ways of working to ensure that they meet these high standards e.g. I must work long hours and always be available because I am the one who does the work right, I can’t publish this presentation until I have sanity checked it 15 times  etc. etc. I’m the only one who can do this right. This statement was an old favorite of mine…. 

Do you find that you may validate your self-worth by the standards you set and beat yourself up when you don’t achieve them? I can share with you that this was exactly my pattern. 

Many high-achieving women I meet and work with have perfectionist and high achieving tendencies, but with the right tools and support, it is possible to work with these tendencies and relax them.

You have to get to the root cause of why you are striving for these sometimes-impossible standards and then gradually rewire your mind to think about healthier standards. I can tell you for me these tendencies go back to late teen years when I validated my self-worth through my career and achievements. I thought that my family would be proud of me if I had a high flying career, so very early on in my career I found myself setting impossibly high work standards that would always end with me burnt out, stressed, anxious, overwhelmed, not in control of my emotions, the list is endless.

Letting go of perfectionism is a process

In my program I help my clients how to do this in a safe confidential space. I act as your unbiased mentor and sound board to assist you focus on calming these tendencies that may cause you distress and anxiety.

I also support senior HR leaders to put in place policies and networks to create inclusive workspaces for women where they can openly talk about their high achieving tendencies. – These initiatives are something that all businesses can implement to create a more positive environment. As a former CHRO myself I know how vital this is.

There’s a difference between striving to achieve something and striving for perfection, wherein you realize getting something done is better than perfect. This means that despite the flaws, finishing a task is an accomplishment. At some point, you realize that imperfections aren’t always so bad.

You can start to work on these perfectionist tendencies today!

Start by questioning your unhelpful rules and assumptions begin asking yourself this important question:

What’s an unhelpful rule I have that doesn’t serve me any longer?

E.g., I need to work on my vacation time because I need to be available; I am the only one who can fix things…

The phrase ‘done is better than perfect’ means that even if you didn’t get every specific detail right, it’s more important that you finish a task. Perfectionism may seem like a good trait initially, but it’s dangerous to your well-being.

Done is better than perfect means that even if you didn’t get the expectation you wanted in a certain output, you should still be proud that you finished a task. Although far from perfect, you still did it with effort and precision, and that’s what’s important. 

Done is better than perfect means that you have healthy boundaries and expectations for yourself. You know that it’s impossible to achieve perfection and rather than attempting to achieve it through breaking yourself, you accept the mediocrity of a certain result.

I know how hard it is (especially as a woman!) to stay focused on calming your perfectionist tendencies. I love helping women just like you develop those new rules so you can focus on what’s important in your life and career, get in touch and we can rewire those rules together!

Contact me today for a free discovery call

Lets see if we are a good fit to work together

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